Friday, 15 May 2009


I was thinking earlier - image is a strange thing. Thinking about how you to look, trying not to care about how you look. Image is something I tend to think about quite a bit. I don't mean that I spend a lot of time thinking about how I want to look, but I think about the subject as a whole.

I think I'm quite a fickle person. Maybe fickle isn't the right word. I'm a girl who changes her mind quickly. Today I want to be a music teacher, tomorrow I want to be a policewoman, today I want to be individual, outgoing, tomorrow I want to hide behind dark glasses and a polo neck top.

This becomes quite a problem when choosing what to wear or deciding how I want people to perceive me, and as I don't even understand me it's hard to decide how I want them to understand me.

I find the hardest thing is to be individual. I'm oversensitive and not very confident so say for example...
If I was feeling particularly 'individual' and confident one day and decided to wear something that I wouldn't usually be brave enough to and...say...I walked past a group of girls who giggled as I went by (probably about something completely unrelated) then my confidence would plummet and I'd feel awful about myself for the rest of the day.

I am getting better - but I find it so hard not to care what others think. I'd love to have the confidence not to care at all.

To be honest I think losing a little bit of weight might help there. I just want to have a flat belly! lol. I don't mean that I want to be skinny, I just need to tone up my flabby tum really! Then I'd feel like I had more of a choice about what clothes I could wear. I'm quite tall - 5 foot 10 - but I weigh about 11 stone. Ideally I'd like to be 10...but I like cake! lol. I know that I just need to exercise more. Anyway...

Yes, image is a weird thing. There are so many influences in the world, it's hard to know what IS individual. I guess the answer is that nothing is. Everything is made up of/has been influenced by something else. It's just a unique combination of a variety of influences which makes each of us individual.

I'd better go to bed now as it's getting late.

The exam went ok by the way - fingers crossed anyway! 1 down - 6 to go!

Night night xxxxx

P.S - Every so often I think I'll attach a video that I particulary like to watch at the end of the post. Here's one that I'm loving at the mo. :)

Video of the moment! lol...


LarryC said...

Holly said: *quote*

It's just a unique combination of a variety of influences which makes each of us individual. *unquote*

Well put, Holly. We are all a product of our unique genes and experiences. There is a 'saying' I like a lot, 'What you see is what you get'. That is the way I do things. Some people will like me and some will not, and that is OK and natural.

No frills and no shows for me. What you see is what you get, lol.

Just being yourself cannot miss. And remember, it is the multitudes that are not being themselves.

Andrew722199 said...

I think we all have confident days, shy days, reckless days and anxious days. Trying to conform is pointless as you can't be the same as everybody else, you can only be you. And when you are as talented as Holly Kirby, then why would you want to be like anyone else anyway?