Thursday, 30 April 2009


Tomorrow is my German speaking exam. I'm a tad stressed. :-S I'm not exactly nervous...just stressed. :-S Probably because I've got a lot to do. We've got another meeting about the thing again tomorrow. It does feel like it's been drawn out quite a bit. I think this is the last meeting though. I also have to sort some stuff out for my music exam before I travel to a separate school for my music lesson. I'll be so happy when Saturday arrives. Or when June 18th arrives and my music year starts.

Today I was looking at the English course at Oxford Uni on their website. I'm not really sure it's for me. I'm more interested in 19th/20th/21st century literature, but it seems as though the majority of their studies are based on the literature before then - i.e 1100 - 1800. And I'm not so keen on the very old stuff.

I was talking to one of my teachers today about what I'm going to do with my life etc....

She said "so...what are your plans then? I know you wanted to change..." and I replied with a bit of a shrug and said "Ummm...I've applied for music, got offers and accepted one of them, but then I'll get my results and probably change my mind again!"
She laughed and said "...I'm thinking you need to organise your future a little bit more Holly!"
I'm thinking she's very right! I just can't stick with one idea for more than about a week at the moment! I'm going round in circles. I wish I knew what to do.

Anyway, I'd better go now - don't want to fall asleep in my exam tomorrow!

Night night xxxxx

Wednesday, 29 April 2009

Waterloo Road

As you can see - the video worked! Phew! :) Hope it's OK!

Today was my favourite day of the week (ok, apart from the weekend perhaps) - Wednesday for me is known as Waterloo Road Day. HOORAAAAAAY! :D

Waterloo Road is a TV program - to which I am completely addicted. I don't think there's any other word for it. It's a strange sensation, looking forward to a certain day JUST because a TV show is on. But it's a great show. I don't know why I like it so much. Maybe I can relate to it because it's set in a school or something? I don't know...BUT I LOVE IT!!! :D

Oops...this is turning into a bit of a Waterloo Road shrine...

Anyway! I'd better go now as I need to wash my hair! But before I do I'd just like to put a link to a video made by a friend of mine called Tom (you may recognise the music in the background.) :)

I'd best be off now...

Night night xxxx

Down by the Salley Gardens - it worked! :)

Tuesday, 28 April 2009

Not a video

Hi everyone - happy Tuesday!

Today has consisted of German lessons, revision and playing my tin whistle for a bit of a break. I love Irish music. I really wish I had more opportunities to play my low whistle. Traditional music has something really special about it. Maybe it's the amount of history behind the music, or the fact that traditional tunes were passed on from musician to musician, not by sheet music, but by teaching each other and sharing the experience.

Anyway, I took a little vid for you. It's very rushed because I had just over two minutes left on the camera! And I realise now that I look a bit stressed!...

OOOOH GRRR! I've been trying to upload this vid for ages and it hasn't worked. :(
I'm going to have to go to bed now. Grrrrrrr...

I'm sorry, this has been a very short post. I was expecting to have the video here. :( Doh.

I'll try to upload it tomorrow. (It's not very good though, so don't get too excited! lol)

Night night xxxxx

Bye Bye Gig :(

Here's the pic of Red - as promised - I'm sorry it's not really a very good one. I had to zoom in quite a lot.

It was raining today so no bugs were about - I'll check when it's sunny though. :)

When I got into school this morning I opened my school email and found an email waiting for me in my inbox. - An email from one of the members of the headlining band at my BSFA Gig. I presumed it would be a message asking which equipment to bring/asking what would be provided, but quickly and unfortunately realised that it was not. - It was an email saying that the headliners could no longer perform. So I went into the School's Senior Leadership Team (all the boss teachers) meeting this morning and asked what I should do and they said - cancel it.

So I did - I took down the posters and told all my friends - but then I was told that they COULD do it after all - but not at the time they were meant to - they would have to leave really early - so we just kept it cancelled.

It's so annoying - and so disappointing. :(

Apart from that I've been revising Miles Davis' 'Four' - and practising for my german speaking exam - which is on Thursday - aaaaaaaah! Hopefully I'll be OK. I've made a revision timetable and I'm really trying to stick to it.

Today we had a meeting with a police officer about the thing I've been mentioning every so often. I'm beginning to forget it already.

I was also talking to my English Teacher today about studying war literature at University and she explained about how I could specialise in that particular subject in my later years - which sounds rather interesting! - Something that I'll definitely have to look into! :)

As you can probably tell I don't have much to say today - I'm a tad sleepy after doing my revising.

I'd better go now,

Night night xxxx

Sunday, 26 April 2009

The Buzzy Bug

Today I re-potted my little tomato plants. Hooray! Whilst I was doing so, this buzzy hover bug thing literally would NOT leave me alone. My Dad came out to the garden and said "Do you realise there's bug hovering about a foot away from the back of your head?" I could hear a constant buzzing the whole time I was outside - and I was out there for about an hour. Each time I heard it behind me I would turn around to look at it...and it would dart towards my face and go round behind my head again! - So by the time Dad came outside I had given up.

Later on I went outside to sit in the sun and annotate an article about how certain pieces of war literature have been wrongly given the label "Anti-War". (-About Robert Graves and Siegfried Sassoon in particular - v. interesting.) I was about halfway through and had completely forgotten about the whole buzzy thing...until...


I looked and there it was again, right in front of my face. It just looked at me and buzzed off round the back of my head, only to dart off again when I turned to face it. I think I highly underestimated the intelligence of this little buzzy bug. Surely it knew what it was doing? I wondered what made it want to keep on hanging around me. Then I thought about it a bit. This morning, whilst re-potting my tomato plants I was wearing my pyjamas...(Sunday's a lazy day...right? :))...and my pyjamas happen to be extremely multicoloured and could, to an intelligent little buzzy thing, appear to be just like flowers! Well, that, or else I smelt nice. (Not probable in the morning).

So I guess I made a new friend today. I wonder if he'll be there tomorrow morning - I won't know because I'll be at school. I'll check when I get home though...I'm sure I'll recognise him...buzzy bug...tiny...wings...buzzes. Yeeeeeeeah. I think I'll call him Red. Because today he showed some great acrobatic skills - much like the Red Arrows - here's a link if you don't know what I'm talking about...

Anyway, I'd best be off now - school tomorrow! :-S

Night night xxxxx

P.S - the buzzy bug (or should I say...Red?) once hovered in the same place long enough for me to take a photo of him. I'll try to upload it tomorrow. :)


Not much at all to report today as I've been revising for most of the day. I've been trying to understand the structure, tonality, and the rest of Miles Davis' 'Four.' It's a bebop jazz piece from the 50s and I really can't get a grip on it. Jazz really isn't my favourite genre, but we have to study it. Another piece we have to analyse is 'Don't Look Back in Anger' by Oasis - I guess that kind of makes up for it.

I've also been trying to practise for my German speaking exam which is next Thursday - the same day as the Gig! :-S Tickets sales aren't looking great at the mo, though lots of people said they would come. I believe we've sold 9...nearly matches the number of musicians I guess! :-S

This evening after I'd finished revising I tried to draw Wilfred Owen. I copied a picture from his biography. I find it really difficult to draw people as I can never get the eyes right. They are very daunting things to try to replicate. Eyes give an insight into a person's soul - and photographs can capture the emotion behind the eyes - but drawing is very different as you have to create the life yourself. I love drawing but sometimes it makes me frustrated - I have to get things perfect and I can never get a drawing perfect. Maybe I should try painting abstract things rather than doing detailed drawings! - That's something for the gap year I think - this was just a little filler.

Anyway, I'd better go. I'm still tired after my late night yesterday and I need energy for re-potting my tomato plants tomorrow! :) ...and for revising...oh yes.

Night night xxxxx

Saturday, 25 April 2009

Que Sera, Sera...

Wow, this has been a pretty tiring first week back! :-S In good ways and bad ways. I loved going to see Evita yesterday, but I feel drained after this whole ongoing issue thing. Hopefully we'll get some closure soon - I will be able to move on when I've spoken to him face to face.

I had Music this afternoon. I always find the lessons really hard. It's almost like learning a new language. Apparently it's the third hardest A-Level - after Further Maths and Physics - that's what I keep telling myself whenever I'm finding it too hard. There's so much to remember - our teacher says it's like a huge memory test. We have to remember literally every musical feature in about 6 pieces from film/tv scores and also 3 pieces from the pop/jazz part of the well as knowing about the forms, themes, characteristics of the musical eras, being able to perform pieces of music to a high standard, write bach chorales and baroque counterpoints, compose pieces of music to a high's such a challenge.

Last July I went on a week's summer school at Oxford University to do music. I found it really interesting and fell in love with the University. I was so disappointed when my music teacher told me that she really didn't think I could get an A - for Oxford your results need to be AAA - and I'm apparently on target for two As in German and English Lit - so Music was so disappointing. If I get two As for English Lit and German I might try to stay on at school in my gap year and do an A-Level in a year - which means going in for about 8 hours a week. I'm thinking about it. I'd really love to leave school with three As, that would be brilliant. I might try to study English Literature at Oxford, that would be wonderful.

I'm not 100% sure that I'd want to study music anyway. Part of the reason why I love music so much is the fact that it contains so much raw emotion. A song comes from the heart, it's a spontaneous moment, a very personal thought. Analysing it in the depth that we do at school makes it seem so mechanical and contrived. We listen to music for pleasure, to reassure ourselves that we're not alone, to become involved in the emotions of the composer - not to analyse every single chord and try to find a formula responsible for making us feel the way we do. Creativity can't be explained - and explaining it shouldn't be attempted. Part of the magic is the mystery.

I'd better go now; it's getting late and I have a long weekend of revision ahead of me!

Night xxxxxx

Thursday, 23 April 2009

Don't Cry for Me Argentina...

Today I went to go and see Evita at a local theatre which I thought was wonderful. There was a place on the GCSE group trip so I went along as a 'responsible adult' (teehee!). I'd never really heard much about the show before. I knew it was by Andrew Lloyd Webber - but not a lot after that.

I thought the show was absolutely brilliant. The performers were amazing and so professional - I was in awe. I couldn't believe how many lines they had to learn either! lol - I get stuck remembering the words of a three minute song...and that's usually a song that I've written! Actually, when I was about thirteen I was Cinderella when we performed it with the theatre group I was a part of - there were lots of lines in that as I was on in every scene. :-S

Learning lines in acting has never really been a big problem for me. I used to do festivals and won a few cups and stuff for reciting poems. I also got honours for my grade 8 acting. :D That was a while ago though. I don't really do acting anymore - only through my songs. I did enjoy acting though. Maybe I'll start again one day.

Anyway...Evita. :) I thought the story was absolutely fascinating. I'd never heard of Eva Peron before. I guessed it was true because there were portraits of her on the stage at the 'shrine' kind of scene and so I read a bit about her when I got home. I think her story is wonderful, though very tragic. I'd love to see it again soon actually - now I've looked into the history a bit more.
Here's a link to a YT video with pics and a little info at the side...

She seemed a bit like Princess Diana in a way. - The people's princess, tragically lost so young. :(
I'd still like to find out more about Eva Peron and her story. Maybe that's a thing for the gap year. :) I really need to go and see more musicals in my gap year! I've seen Wicked in the West End (Idina Menzel playing Elphie :)) and Evita and that's it. I'd love to see The Lion King. :) I used to absolutely looooooooove that film (and still do!)...but it's so sad when poor Mufasa dies. :'(

Anyway, I'd better go now - need to wash my hair!

Lots of love,


Wednesday, 22 April 2009

A little bit of loveliness :)

Today was a good day :) (apart from my computer playing up...grrrrrrrrr.)
After school I went down to the beach. Just to sit and read my Lyrical Ballads book. Ben came down and joined me too. Lyrical Ballads were written by Wordsworth and Coleridge - I have to study them for my English Literature Exam. They're very strongly related to nature and it's odd, but I can only really concentrate on my book when I'm reading outside. Maybe it's because it relates to the poems and makes them easier to imagine.
Anyway, I took a few pics on the way down to the beach...
Just a field I passed...Ben keeps winding me up because he thinks I'm scared of horses.

I'm really not, I think they're very graceful - I've just never fancied riding one! I loved Black Beauty! :)

So this is sort of to prove to Ben that I'm not scared. Even though he doesn't read this.

And I thought it was quite a nice view anyway. :)
This one is of the beach - I think these cats were probably over from the mainland on a day trip or something - there were sailors in the cafe.
It was such a lovely day - the water was all sparkly. :) This photo doesn't really do it justice!
After that Mum picked me up and Brooke came round for tea. It was a lovely day so we went outside and ran around the garden a bit. :) No...we actually did - despite our funny way of running! We had some races - Brooke won, :) - we had a "who can roll the furthest down the hill?" race - Brooke won, we made daisy chains, played dizzy dinosaurs and played "the batting game" as Brooke calls it - a game where you have a cricket bat and whoever hits the ball the most times in a row wins...I think Brooke probably won that one too!

I also have found a very relevant song that makes me feel better when I listen to it. It's called 'Good Souls' by Starsailor...

So I turn to you and I say
Thank goodness for the Good Souls that make life better.
So I turn to you and I say
If it wasn't for the Good Souls life would not matter.

Anyway, I probably ought to go now.
Night nightxxxxx

P.S -Don't worry - I hadn't forgotten! lol...
Here are the tomato and pepper plants with their proud owner going a bit cross-eyed!...

Tuesday, 21 April 2009

Tickets and sunshine

There's not really much to report about today. The boy I've been talking about's computer has apparently been seized whilst the photos are circulating the school. There's nothing we can do though, I just have to try to not let it get to me. Easier said than done. :( I did let it get to me today, but I guess it's better to let it out than keep it in.

Today I started selling tickets for the Building Schools For Africa Gig. I sold four :) lol. Lots of people said they were coming - but just didn't have the money on them today. It was only the first day of sales though, I'm hoping there'll be more than four people there in the end! :)

I did a bit of revising out in our garden today which was quite nice (being out in the sun - not revising!) - and I had my german lesson after that.

Anyway, I'd better go.

Night night xxxxx

P.S - I'll try to take a photo of my plants tomorrow. :)

Monday, 20 April 2009

War poets, a gig and plants.

Well today was my first day back after the Easter Holidays.

Obviously things were a little tense after what us girls found out about over the holidays - the boy who did it wasn't in school and I doubt he will be for a couple of weeks - well that's what people are saying anyway. I don't see why he didn't come in actually - things will be the same whenever he turns up. People will be angry, but I guess that's expected. To be honest, I can't be bothered to be angry anymore. I'll never forgive him, but I think he knows that asking for forgiveness is a bit silly anyway.

Today was a good day actually - I got an English essay back that I did before the holidays and found out that I got an A for it - which is always pretty cool! :) We had to compare a poem by Herman Melville with 'They' by Siegfried Sassoon. Sassoon is one of my favourite poets. Wilfred Owen, Siegfried Sassoon, Robert Graves and Alfred, Lord Tennyson are my four faves (in order)...possibly Alfred Noyes too actually. I have a bit of a soft spot for Wilfred Owen.

I don't know why, but I absolutely love reading war poetry - especially from the First World War. I love finding about the poets too and learning about their lives. I wish there was a whole university course on War Literature - I'd be there in a flash.
I've also been organising a gig today. I'm currently doing some fundraising for the charity 'Building Schools for Africa.' It's a great cause - here's the website...

Our school has to raise £3000 to help build a school - they need £10,000 to build a whole school - so all of the schools in our area are raising £3000 each. If we all reach our targets then I guess they'll have a bit spare. :)
I'm the representative at our school and as the rest of our school council is working hard on doing things for the leavers, I'm doing the fundraising on my own. - It's fun though.

I've designed posters and tickets and now I need to get them printed. Tickets go on sale tomorrow! I could only get the date okayed today, so it's a bit of a rush - the gig is next Thursday - only TEN days to go! Hopefully it'll go well.

Anyway - I think that's all to report today.

Ooooh! the moment I'm growing tomato and pepper plants! I'm so excited! lol - they're the first plants I've grown from seed...I think. They're doing well so far! (Much better than Dad's :P haha) I'm so proud of them. Maybe I'll take a photo that a bit sad? lol.

I'd best be off now - bedtime - and a busy day ahead of me tomorrow. :)

Lots of love,

Sunday, 19 April 2009


After getting a bit of verbal abuse on blogtv yesterday I didn't feel much like giving it another go today - but I'm glad I did. It's really not worth giving up and letting the bad guys win. I realise now that if I let them upset me then I'd just as well be handing them a trophy and giving them a pat on the back - and I'd be letting too many wonderful people down anyhow.

So today I did my first 'proper' gig on blogtv and despite the occasional plonker, I really enjoyed it. I mean reeeeeeeeeeally. There were so many lovely people on there and it felt like they were in the room with me. They gave so much wonderful support and made me feel really comfortable. I was a bit nervous at first, but after a few songs I think I was alright.

Something that never ceases to make me go all goosebumpy is when people know my originals - and say "Can you sing Tea Leaves?" (or "the teabag song" as some people call it! lol) or "I Live Through the Song?" It's the best feeling ever. Each song is like a little piece of what I'm thinking - just a little expression - and it's wonderful how people can find their own meanings in the songs - I feel so flattered.

Anyway - all in all - a very good day. I also had a surprise visit from a very good German friend of mine that I hadn't seen in ages this morning - which was lovely.


Bye for now,


Saturday, 18 April 2009

A bit of a funny.


Today's been a bit of a funny day.

Better than yesterday though. Yesterday I was let down badly by someone I thought was a friend.

A friend of mine decided to steal photos of me and 20 other of my girl friends and post them on a porn site so that people could make them into porn for him. He'd been doing that for a year, and apparently been making money out of it.

At first I was extremely angry and upset, but now I'm just hurt. I feel let down. I feel dirty and disgusting in myself. My picture was merged - quite realistically - with porn. What if someone sees me and recognises my face? I feel paranoid. When someone lets you down like that you wonder who you can trust.

I'm very sensitive and I get hurt very easily. Today I was testing out blogtv for tomorrow and someone came on and started verbally abusing me. I was singing a song I'd written about a very dear friend who committed suicide. I'm sensitive about singing the song - I hardly ever sing it. So when I looked up I was mortified to find all this abuse from a stranger. What's wrong with some people? They have no respect. I feel so disappointed - and it's such a horrible feeling.

It's a shame all the negative emotions seem more prominent. There are so many wonderful people in the world - so many wonderful people doing wonderful things.

When I feel like this I just have to remind myself of the people close to me that I know and love and think about how lucky I am to know them.

Well, it's getting late,

Night night. xxx

Friday, 17 April 2009


Well HELLOOO! :)

It's great to see you! (Yes...I can see through computer that a wall behind you?)

A very warm welcome to my blog. Here I hope to write a bit each day about what's going on. I'm planning on having a musical gap year starting in June '09 - so things should get a tad more exciting from then - i.e - more to write about etc.

Please feel free to stick around and see what's going on - as I said - I hope (fingers crossed!) to be updating this a little bit each day, revision permitting!

Thanks for visiting! :)

Tata for now,